CBS Misses Last Play of Final Four Game

The replay is useful - yeah but...
In the final two seconds don't cut
Away from live action
To replay an infraction,
Leaving millions of fans saying, "What?"

CBS blows the call on the final play of NCAA semifinals. Game ends while a replay was being shown.

Man Survives Cougar Attack - Saved By A Bear!

Robert Biggs, who was out for a walk,
Saw some bears so he stopped there to gawk.
A cat pounced from behind!
Mama Bear, being kind,
Smacked the lion, while Biggs watched in shock!

Man lucky to escape with only bruises and scratches...

Lions and hikers and bears, oh my!

Jane Fonda Miscast as Nancy Reagan

Hanoi Jane is low rent, like a stripper.
As a pal, I'd prefer Jack the Ripper.
So my feelings are strong
That I think that it's wrong
That they'd cast her to play Mrs. Gipper.

Although, I guess with movies you have to allow for some suspension of disbelief...

Interviewers Asking Job Seekers For Facebook Passwords

In an interview, we've been required
To reveal if we quit or were fired
From our previous job.
Now they're trying to rob
Us of passwords? Mine's: J@sonUrHir3d.


So if the interviewer would just read that back to me, we'll shake on it...

Bye Bye Tebow, the Broncos Have a New Quarterback

Mister Manning has signed with the Bronc's
The Titans' fan sniffles and honks.
And the 'niners are hatin'
The blow-off by Peyton,
And when called by Seattle, "No thonx."


My apologies to Ogden Nash for blatantly ripping off his word.

Former Colts QB signs with the Denver Broncos

French President Scolds Son For Bad Behavior

Did you hear about little Sarkozy?
He felt life at the palace was prosy.
Bringing shame to his pop,
Threw some fruit at a cop...
I would beat on his buns 'till they're rosy.

Louis Sarkozy scolded for pelting a policewoman with tomatoes.

7-11 Runs Out of Sausages, Sends Customer Into Rage

Ms. Glanville, I offer my thoughts:
If you've partied and drank a few shots
And you're needing to eat,
It would be more discreet
To buy chips if they're all out of brats.


Woman attacks 7-11 clerk for running out of hot dogs...